This week has been likened to birthing and I should know, I had two home births but this was nothing like them! The pain I have been through over the last week was intense, relentless and seemed never-ending but as with all contractions and pushes, my new baby was born – my future.
After 5.5 years of working at Planet Space Self Storage, certainly the best job I have ever had, with the nicest bosses and colleagues who cared about me and visa versa, I resigned. I have no job to go to, friends were worried for my financial future but the decision was taken with the love and support of those special to me. My mother was the one who pointed out that for the future I hankered for, there was only one solution. Leave the comfort and safety of my job, say goodbye to what I know and greet the unknown and be open to receiving.
When I realised the choice was mine and mine alone, it suddenly became that simple – time to let go of the river bank and go with the flow of the river towards the wide, open sea. To say I am scared and nervous is the truth but the excitement and enthusiasm inside me to be able to say no to the fear and do it anyway has taken over.
At 51 years of age, I am tired of holding back, of feeling scared of what others think of me, nervous about remembering my lines – the ones of my life. I feel that by applying those values that have always been dear to me, I can jump into my future, feet first and head high. Remembering my dad during this painful process made me realise that no matter what, he was never concerned about the money. He lost jobs because of his beliefs, he moved countries because authorities couldn’t handle him but he laughed, he loved and boy did he live!
Between him and my mother telling me to go for it, I can’t fail. With the love and respect felt from those important to me, I can’t fail. With the smile on my face as I consider the absurdity of the world today, I cannot fail.
Changes, challenges and choices. Translated… we are here to live, learn and above all love life.